i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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