I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Randomize
