He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize