ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
