ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize