even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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