i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
