I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
