After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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