What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
