READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
