escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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