sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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