Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
