Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
