It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize