Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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