He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
