Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
third nipple confirmed
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
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