Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
