You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize