I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
the night ended with taco bell and tears
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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