ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Randomize
