he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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