it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Randomize
