did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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