Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
now i know why i became what i already was.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
