i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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