I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
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