you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
