Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
