the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
he shaved USA in his pubs
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
