"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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