I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
