Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
