I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize