That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
