It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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