I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Randomize
