that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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