I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
