Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
they're like a gay fantastic four
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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