it wasn't lemon gatorade
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
How does one acquire holy water?
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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