im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Randomize
