She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
