i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
