i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
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