office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
