I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
