the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
