i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
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