They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
