She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
